Stuckness.. Negativity.. Acceptance.. And Changing The Energy..

Stuckness..  Negativity..  Acceptance..  And Changing The Energy.. 

What can you do when, whatever you try, you seem to be getting nowhere?  You are beating yourself up because you are overweight, you are out of work, you have no money coming in, you have bills to pay, you can’t afford stuff for your kids, you have health problems, your partner has problems too..  or you are all alone..  You may be using alcohol to blank out from your worries.. or medications or drugs..  but you know that is not a good solution, but however much you try, you just can’t seem to break out of the “habit”..  You feel that life is just passing you by..  You may feel you are “past your prime” in life..  You’re just never going to get anywhere..  You are stuck.

And you seem to have been stuck forever..  You have tried numerous ways of attacking the problem, but nothing seems to get you out of your stuckness.  You have asked other people for help, you have tried all the methods you know have worked for others, you have tried all the methods that used to work for you in the past..  But nothing is working now..  You are frustrated, overwhelmed, exhausted, totally fed up with making the effort, totally fed up with living like this..  But you can’t give up..  But nothing you do seems to make a difference.  You’ve heard the term “just keep going”, things will get better eventually, just keep the faith, keep trying, it will work out in the end..  But it has been going on for so long…  You are not sure if you have anything left in you to keep trying anymore..  And you are not even sure anymore what it is you are trying to do, or what you need to keep trying to do..  You’ve lost the plot..  You had dreams, but they all seem impossible now, pie-in-the-sky, so far away..  it all seems futile..  You can’t remember the last time you felt good.. about yourself.. or your life..  You just want to sleep..  or go hit the bottle and blot it all out..

Your brain hurts with constantly going round and round, trying to figure out how to solve the problem..  You keep trying to think of other options, other methods of attack, other opportunities, other ideas, other roads, other directions..  You are just so exhausted and frustrated and totally fed up with it all..  You know you are not lazy..  You know you are intelligent, resourceful, creative, hard-working..  You know you have skills, talents, qualifications, and lots of things you can offer the world..  But you just can’t seem to figure out a way to get out there and make use of all this positive stuff you have..  Why can’t you solve the problem?!  You’ve tried lots of different things..  But you just seemed to come up against constant obstacles, closed doors, resistance, rejection..  You are totally discouraged, have lost all confidence in yourself, and you’ve lost all faith in the world in general.. 

You know that there are lots of other people in the world who are much worse off than you – whether due to culture, religion, geographical location, economy, politics, poverty, lack of opportunity, lack of education, lack of food/warmth/home/work, war, terrorism, famine, earthquakes, floods, drought, tsunamis, hurricanes, and so on..  You should be grateful for what you have – food, warmth, clothes, friends, technology, whatever..  But you just can’t..  The word “gratitude” just irritates you..  You just can’t connect with it, you can’t feel it..  You’ve heard of the “law of attraction”, that you get back what you put out..  So is it all your own fault?!  So you beat yourself up again for being a whingeing, whineing, moaning minnie..  Why don’t you just get off your ass and do something?!  But what?  You feel as though you have tried everything you can think of, but you just seem to go round in circles..  or you get nowhere at all..  You’re stuck.  There must be another way, another approach, some other route or method you haven’t thought of yet..  Your brain hurts..

So what do you do?  Accept?  So what is acceptance?  Is it giving up?  You can’t do that.  What about acknowledgement?  What about “going with the flow”?  What about stopping resisting?  Letting go?  Trusting the universe?  What does all this mean?  You’re not sure you know what all this means.  How can you “go with the flow” when you are stuck?

Releasing and letting go of negative energy (thoughts, feelings, emotions, beliefs, and so on).  You feel sure it’s something to do with this.  But how do you do that? 

Small steps..  Small efforts..  Repetitive small efforts..  Small changes..  Persistent, consistent changes..  That last bit sounds too much to be able to do, to keep up..  Let’s go back to small steps and small efforts..  and repeating them whenever you feel you can.  You’re still not sure how you let go of negative energy etc..  The negative stuff is part of your daily life, your daily routine, your unconscious habits..  Well, if we can’t start with releasing the negative stuff just yet, how about trying to introduce a few positive things first..  Maybe if you do that, and keep doing it, little by little, the positive energy will start to push out the negative stuff..  What little positive things can you do?  Well, do one or two things that make you feel a bit better.  Do your hair, do your make-up, brush your teeth, have a shave, have a relaxing bath, wear something pretty or smart.  Play some music you like, watch a movie you love, or a comedy show.  Tidy up, do the laundry, do the dishes, make the bed.  File some papers that need filing.  Tidy your clothes away.  Take a walk.  Feel the sun/rain/wind on your face.  Watch the birds outside, listen to the breeze rustling the trees, look up at the sky.  Read a book.  Phone/skype/email/text a friend.  Arrange to meet up with a friend/ someone who makes you feel good.  (NB. Avoid negative/ critical/ unsupportive/ unsympathetic people!)  Meditate/listen to a guided visualisation.  Attend a workshop/lecture.  Join a class or club.  Go to the gym.  Do some yoga/tai chi.  Go for a run/jog/swim/bike-ride.  Drive somewhere nice in the car or travel somewhere on the train/bus.  Visit the seaside.. or a river, garden, meadow, lake, mountain.. whatever..  Draw, paint, write poetry.  Write a blog or write in your journal/diary.  Be creative in the kitchen.  Stroke the cat.  Take the dog for a walk.  Play with your kids.  And be present with all of these moments and experiences.  Be “mindful” of them.  Savour any good feelings..  and commit them to your bank of good memories and experiences..

Look at old photos of good times..  places and people and experiences that evoke happy memories.  Remember back to good times and places and people and experiences..  Daydream and relive some of these happy times if you can..  just for a little while..

And acknowledge..  that you are taking small positive steps, doing small positive things..  Congratulate yourself.  And accept..  Accept yourself for what and who you are at the present moment, and for where you are at the present time.  Accept that you are doing the best you can at the present time.  Sometimes that is the very best we can do..  and the only thing we can do..  Be kind to yourself.  Be patient with yourself.  Little by little, know that the energy is changing..  that you are helping to change the energy..  adding a little positive here and there..  and little by little replacing and releasing the negative..

Amanda Jackson-Russell, BSc (Hons), PhD (Neuroscience), Clinical & Cognitive-Behavioural Hypnotherapist, Emotional Therapist, EFT Practitioner, Stress Management Consultant/ Relaxation Skills Trainer, Meditation & Mindfulness Instructor, Reiki Master, Spiritual/Energy Healing Facilitator, Healer Member of NFSH, Medical/Health Writer & Editor. AJR Hypnotherapy Surrey and Energessence Natural Healing. Epsom, Ewell, Ashtead, Leatherhead, and surrounding areas, Surrey, England.

Relaxation therapies, hypnotherapy, emotional freedom technique (EFT) and energy healing at AJR Hypnotherapy Surrey and Energessence Natural Healing – with clinics in the Leatherhead and Epsom, Surrey areas

AJR Hypnotherapy Surrey and Energessence Natural Healing now have clinics in Great Bookham (near Leatherhead), Ashtead, and Ewell (near Epsom), Surrey. Following a sabbatical period, the full range of relaxation therapy / stress management, emotional therapy, cognitive-behavioural hypnotherapy, and energy healing services are now available, and I look forward to greeting you and helping you meet your healing / therapy needs. My aim has always been to help empower a person in their healing journey, providing guidance and methods to facilitate their innate self-healing abilities, and ultimately enabling them to recognise, trust, utilise and optimise their own personal power, as well as recognising, accessing and trusting the universal intelligence that is available to all. These may be controversial ideas to some, but I make no apologies. “To every man, his own Truth, and the God within..” (Taken from The Mists of Avalon, by Marion Bradley, so please forgive the overt masculine references, but it is meant for everyone, male, female, or neither, animal, plant, or other living thing..). At this time in our world’s development, it is of importance more than ever that we feel and express the highest qualities we can – of tolerance, compassion, kindness, understanding, forgiveness, wisdom and unconditional love…

If you would like a pragmatic approach to dealing with your problems, then perhaps cognitive-behavioural hypnotherapy is the approach for you. If you need a broader and more free-flowing therapeutic experience, then EFT is an alternative approach you can try, to perhaps help you cut your way through layers of confusing emotional issues. If you are feeling low in energy or have had prolonged stresses or illness to deal with, and you need a more passive and supportive approach to get you up and going again, then an energy healing (eg. Reiki and Deep Relaxation) approach may be a more sympathetic option for you to begin with. Whatever approach is your preference, I look forward to meeting you at one of our clinics. Please visit other parts of this website, and / or phone or email for further information or to book an appointment (see contact details at top right of this blog page).

Amanda Jackson-Russell, Clinical & Cognitive-Behavioural Hypnotherapist, BSc (Hons), PhD (Neuroscience), EFT Practitioner, Reiki Master, Relaxation & Meditation Instructor, MNFSH, Medical Writer & Editor. AJR Hypnotherapy Surrey & Energessence Natural Healing.

What is hypnotherapy? It is learning how to optimise and utilise the incredible depths and power of your own mind for your own health and wellbeing, and for the highest expression of you own positive potential in your life…

The only things that most people “know” about hypnosis or hypnotherapy are what they have seen on the TV, in stage hypnosis programmes or somewhat dated movies. Unfortunately, these are most usually very sensationalist and inaccurate representations of what hypnosis can do and what the many benefits of hypnotherapy can be. I grew up with a very enlightened mother who introduced my older brother and myself, at a very early age, to the general principles of self-hypnosis, in a very simple, benign and inspiring way. We learned about positive thinking, about “programming” ourselves to sleep peacefully and deeply through the night, and even how to enhance our abilities to memorise poems or maths formulae to help us with our school work. I’m not sure how my Mum knew about such abilities, apart from her own experiences and a lot of reading, as it was not until many years later that she finally had the time and opportunity to actually train as a hypnotherapist and psychotherapist. But those early years’ learning experiences stayed with me throughout my formative years and are still with me, among many other enlightened and spiritual influences of my mother. Despite our differences in other ways, we both understood, instinctively, about the power of the mind and how it shapes your experiences and your very existence, and that it is ultimately up to you how you control it and make good use of it.

Despite these influences, I came to hypnotherapy kind of by the back door – although maybe part of it was a reluctance to follow in my mother’s footsteps, being something of a rebellious and “independent-minded” individual (again here, I am my mother’s daughter!). I initially trained and worked as a medical scientist, specialising in neuroscience – the influence of the brain and nervous system over our bodily functioning, health and behaviour… (or the power of the mind…?). In parallel, I studied and trained as a yoga teacher, which led me to teaching relaxation and meditation techniques, which incorporated the use of self-hypnosis, auto-suggestion, affirmations and therapeutic imagery. On another parallel, I also trained in and practised spiritual healing and counselling, using virtually the same techniques, if with a slightly different “bent”. Later I trained in a number of holistic therapies, practising in large part stress management and emotional therapy. Finally, following my mother’s passing, I had the time and opportunity (almost at the same age as she had) to study and train in hypnotherapy “proper”. I feel I have come home. I am now able to incorporate all those years and experiences and varied trainings into my approaches to my clients, to facilitate their healing on a variety of levels, according to their individual needs.

So, what is hypnotherapy? Hypnotherapy teaches you how to harness the positive power of your own mind to enable you to take control of your life, your thought processes, your emotions and moods, your actions and reactions, your health and wellbeing – to become more aware of how you are using this immense power and to help you maximise its benefits. It helps you recognise how you might be sabotaging your own efforts and intentions, by identifying faulty thought patterns, beliefs and self-talk. It helps you realise how your thought processes influence your moods and emotions, and vice versa. And it helps you see how your habitual unhelpful thoughts and feelings (which you actually have the power to change, given the right methods and techniques) affect your behaviour, reactions, interactions with others, your general health and wellbeing, and ultimately the “colour”, “shape” and “success” of your life – your aspirations, desires, dreams and goals – both in the present and in the future.

Forget what you have seen on the TV and in the movies, or have read about in popularist magazines and newspapers. Hypnosis in nothing like that, and hypnotherapy has nothing to do with those portrayals. If you want to learn how to discover and optimise the power of your own mind, for your own health, wellbeing, success, emotional harmony, peace of mind, personal satisfaction, self-esteem and self-efficacy, and to bring about positive changes in your life, then I urge you most earnestly to give it a try!

Clinical, cognitive-behavioural and traditional approaches to hypnotherapy, emotional freedom technique (EFT), Reiki therapy, and training in relaxation skills, meditation, mindfulness and self-hypnosis are available from AJR Hypnotherapy Surrey, at clinics in Ashtead, Great Bookham and Ewell, which are close to Epsom and Leatherhead, Surrey (close to Junction 9 of the M25). Please visit other parts of this website, and/or phone or email for further information or to book an appointment (see contact details at top right of this blog page). I look forward to meeting you. Amanda Jackson-Russell, Clinical & Cognitive-Behavioural Hypnotherapist, EFT Practitioner, Reiki Master, Relaxation & Meditation Instructor, MNFSH, Medical Writer & Editor.